Tumblr Tumblr Tumblr! No Friday posting for ya… Just too damn busy I guess. LOL! Yea, sorry about that. My little brother Caleb graduated from high school on Friday! :) So proud! (Tear) :) It’s kinda funny how that worked out… 05-me, 07-Dolan, and 09-Caleb. Neatttoo! Saturday we cooked out and had Josh and Caleb over.. smoked a lil reefer (Of course not Bob) and ate some chicken and corn on the cob! YES! :) So good. Then Sunday, my love and I slept in and just chillllled. I order 2 phones today and ($350 a piece that I got for FREEEEE) now we are with t-mobile. So, I think Theresa is with Tmobile. Sucks that Mom doesn’t have it! :( But, I know Bob doesn’t talk on the phone that much, so I will be the one using up the minutes! HAHA! :) I’m excited! I will be receiving the phones tomorrrooowww! God, I love the word FREE. It’s just so nice. Ha! Ok, back later! Peace ↑

Ooooooh, “I shall call him Squishy, and he shall be mine. And he shall be my Squishy.” HAHAHA! :) I looovvveee it! I am so ready to just say SCREW everything and go live on some exotic island… No bills, No work… just roughin’ it! How amazing would that be. Like on “The Beach” with Leo… Wow, what a life. Anyway, back to reality I guess… Work AGAIN! Thank God tomorrow is Friday! Bob’s first day went well yesterday I believe. The guy said he def. has the job and he is a great worker. SO, hopefully I get to see some $$$$$$! I am ready to start saving so we can go on a cruise before kids start coming out of me. LOL. Well, NO KIDS are coming until we get married for sure. You know what’s weird… When I came in and was kind of upset (Because I was chatting with Amanda… I think that was the first day we talked) he asked “What’s wrong” well… I tried to put it off as long as possible and then just kind of belted out “Why aren’t we married?!” and Started crying… LOL! I cried mostly because of the chat with Amanda… not because I am so distrought on not being married. LOL! Oh well, I couldn’t tell him that, so I just rolled with it. I really just need him to HOLD down a job for a least 1 year and then I would like to. That would be fun… Have a semi-cheap wedding and then go on a cruise for our “honeymoon” Woooooo! Oh to dream… Maybe one day. Ok… just needed to get that out. Peace ↑

My poor poor Tumblr! Hahaha! Ok, so the reason I have not typed in here at all is because I changed my email address… so… Me, not thinking. Didn’t fix this first. So, I had to email account services and had to wait 1 week before they could switch it over to my new email. REASON I CHANGED MY EMAIL: Some stalker from like 3 years ago started talking to me on my gat0rchicka account and couldn’t get the hint that I was not interested. He started talking about choloroform and I said fuuucccckkkk that! Hahaha!

ANYWAY! Things have been alright. Bob started ANOTHER new landscaping job today. I believe it is only going to be like 3 days a week… but hey! BETTER THAN NOTHING! I have the shits… I feel like dying because of it! Haha! It’s the worst! Never again I am drinking those damn iced coffees that I can make at work so well… PSH! :***( My tummy hurts. Bob, Jay, and myself all went to John’s house to watch the Orlando vs. Cleveland game last night on a HUGE TV… Magic won!! WOOOOO! It was an amazing game.. and I don’t even watch basketball that much. Overtime and all… 3 pointers gallore!

Since I wrote Amanda… it seems as if everytime we are both online we chat about things. I know I have already talked wayyyy too much! Like telling her EVERYTHING that is going on in our life and in the Heymann household. Not cool of me… I thought about that AFTER I said it, of course. I think I am just going to be more discreet now. Not ask that many questions… and just keep it civil. I know she still wants to be a part of all of that… and I need to make sure she isn’t. Oh well.

Man I feel like crapppppppppp. I hate Wednesdays!

Look at me! 3 days in a row… Weekdays that is! :) I am on cloud 9!! :) Ya know how I was telling ya I send Bob’s ex an email telling her no hard feelings and all? Well, I got a response today that couldn’t have been better. She apologized and I believe it was sincere! You never know, but whatevvv. I am at a point in my life where it’s GOOOOOD! I’m lovin’ it! Unfortunatly Bob’s job didn’t go through, they were just using him to catch up on work… He’ll find something else. I have faith in him! I laid out Saturday andddd Sunday… so I am a little mexicanish… haha! :) It looks good with the blonde hair, I think! I think today had gone by pretttyyyy fast, so now I am off to meet a lady off of Craigslist to purchase her silk plants and candle holders for my casa!!! WAHOO! I love deals! :) Ok, more tomorrow I’m sure, just letting you know what my day consisted of so far… ♥♥♥ Peace ↑

Thank………..that it’s FRIDAY!

Hahaha! He is suppose to be Baby Jesus. :) Anyway… I took 2 energy pills this morning while drinking a Java Mocha energy drink… NOT SMART! I am still buzzin’ and not feeling the best. BAD IDEA. Oh well, it’s 11:48am… I took all this crap at 8AM… supposed to be done by now? Oh well, hopefully by 4pm I can go home and crasssshhh! :) Lovin’ it. So, since Bob is being sooo productive now, with his job, driving class and community service… Tonight is a me and him night. We are going to rent a movie, probably have amazing sex like we usually do and then go to bed. YESSSSSSS! Perfection. Then tomorrow I am watching Mr. Aaron James! I can’t wait. Even though sometimes he can get crazy, it will be okay. At least he is getting to have a bond with his Aunt C! :) It’s going to be so weird when Dolan and Caleb have kids. Hopefully I love Caleb’s gal… I think if and when Dolan and Mere have kids I am probably not going to see them THAT much… getting the hint from not seeing Dolan and Mere THAT much… Ohhhh well. I’ll write more later! Peace ↑!

So, why the hell not decorate my Tumblr page that only I can see? :) Haha! Well, I did get in contact with Ms. Bones whom I want to design my webpage to her best ability… :) We’ll see what happens. Anyway, 1 day closer to Friday! What am I to do with myself? I haven’t heard anything from Bob’s ex, so who knows. Mom thinks I was “stupid” for doing that and it makes me look weak. She asked me why I thought I needed to be nice to her and give her ANY satisfaction. Welllll, it’s for me. It’s for me to know that she knows I am over it and I do really appreciate her not being in our lives… When she has the ability of being RIGHT THERE. Get what I’m saying? I think I am the better person in this and she can do as she pleases…. SOOOOOOOOO back to today! Bob does have the landscaping job down! WOOHOO! They called him last night and asked him to be at the pick location at 8am! Things are coming together. I have to leave work like 10min. early so I pick up my boo from work and take him to his last driving class! WAHOO! Then he will get his certification and be good to go! I believe he is going to get his community service hours done next Monday and Tuesday! :) Then all he will have is this stupid community control until September/October! :) And of course all the fines. Oh well, that is what he can take care of when he works. Pshhhh I am tired! Maybe a nap today? Hmmm! Sounds good! Maybe after I drop him off at his driving class I will come home, do the dishes, and then sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeep! YES! *Long night last night ;) Haha. ok peace↑

Okkkkkk then! Remember me? ::Trying to keep up with this:: Haha! So last night was fun ;) I love how Bob and I have been together for awhile now and still love each other and have fun nights together still. :) It’s really quite a blessing. Phone went to shit though. The screen went white and it will be $50 to fix it… ON HOLD. :) At least I can still check the voicemails & make and receive calls. ANYYYWAYYY, I am not sure I mentioned that Bob got a job… Well he started last Friday and worked From 8AM-8PM and then worked Saturday also, same time! PSH! He only got $70 per day! That is like Mexican labor! He is burnt like a lobster and I’m sure, hating life. I can’t relate what he is going through.. ya know since I sit in the air conditioning all day and he is in 100 degree SUN doing hard work. STILL! We need the money! Badly! It’s hard supporting a FULL GROWN MAN and yourself and ALL the expenses that come along with it. Holyyyyy. Anyway, I think he is trying to stick with it, who knows if the owner really wants Bob on his team? They told him they were going to “try” him out on Friday and Saturday and then let him know something on Wednesday… (They don’t work on Mon & Tues) SOOOOO lets just pray they will raise his pay to at LEAST $9 an hour and use him as much as possible. I had a dream last night that I made up with Bob’s ex… Weird, I know. I was just telling her through a facebook email that I am no longer one of her enemies and there were no hard feelings. Psh, how do you tell someone that in feel life without feeling like a dork? In September in will be a year (that I know of) that she tried rekindling things with Bob… So who knows? Should I do it? Noooooo… I guess it’s one of those things I just have to leave alone. Oh well. Ok… back to work. Peace↑♥

Wow, how cool is that?! Last time I wrote in here was April 20th.. Ugh! I need to type in here more… meaning maybe I wouldn’t be so stressed. :^/   Oh well. So, yesterday was Mother’s Day, saw Mom which was great and spent all the rest of my time with Bob’s family celebrating Elijah’s 1st b-day and “Mother’s Day” out by the pool……. Btw… did I mention our apartment is SMALL AS SHIT? I think we both (Bob and I) just get so overwhelmed when lots of people come over. Anyway, I am really thinking about our relationship. Like if he is really THE ONE. We’ve been together for quite some time now, been through LOTS of shit, good times, bad times, ya know. But in the long run, do I see myself with this guy forever? Makes me think of sandlot when the kid says “Forrrrreeevvvvveeerrrr!” Haha. I don’t know. Makes me a little sick to my stomach even thinking about it. Buttttt, I have been taking care of him since September. SHITTTT! Everything. Getting behind on bills, HIS ciggarettes, HIS alcohol, it’s ridiculous. AND when he works for 2 days and makes $70 a day, you think he saved any of it? FUCK NO. It went to alcohol to surpress his “Oh whoa is me attitude” It’s just crazy. OK back to me. DO I want to keep “dealing” with this? Someone is not going to change when they get a job.. We’ve seen that. AND now he is finding an excuse why he doesn’t want to work for that place anymore… But good ol’ Carly will be here to support him. I know in the back of his mind he is thinking that. Now, what if I do leave? Psh.. he will cry every day until I take him back. I don’t think I am 100% ready to leave him. Maybe this all boils down to him being on this community control shit. We can’t go ANYWHERE! We are stuck. Like Chuck. Like FUCK ME THIS IS HELL! Hahaha! So, what do I do? I just signed another YEAR contract last month. So… and he is on the lease also. I don’t want to be by myself… I just want him to be able to HOLD DOWN A JOB. Regardless if he is being worked like a mexican. He has absoultely NO ambition and I think that is what is putting a toll on me. How am I suposse to have successful children if their Father has no ambition at all? UGHHHHHHHHHHHH! I feel like crying and going to bed. I am exhausted. And he probably didn’t even go to community service today!!! UGH!